Thats an interesting point. I think shyness and anxiety are different too because I’m not really what I would consider shy but I’m nervous all the time in public.
Also I don’t see what people have against extroverts. And I don’t think that they are jerks just because they aren’t shy. I dont really understand that reasoning.
the idea is, extroverts display an entirely different attitude towards life and society, and THAT’s why most introverts feel scorn for them… Don’t think it doesnt go the other way, too !! Extroverts tend to think introverts “are such a bore” , or that they’re snobbish and elitist etc etc etc…
It’s just this enormous set of differences that makes the two dislike each other. It’s the same with analytical and synthetical minds.I think somewhere in the Keirsey temperament sorter site, or one of the other Typology sorter sites, it is stated that non-analytical minds believe that “abstracts make everything look so complicated” whereas analytical minds think that synthetical minds just can’t follow simple logic…
it’s just a difference in the thought process. The two sets speak a different language and thus believe it’s the OTHER one’s fault that they cannot understand each other.
Completely wrong and stupid, but it’s just the way it is… that’s all.
Another introvert here 
Yes osfranky, “completely wrong and stupid” that’s true for sure.
I remember when I was at school I used to dislike extrovert people very much. However now I see it was me the stupid rather than them. It’s really really idiot to dislike people because just they’re different than us. Luckily not all the extroverts are equally ignorant to “the other side” like I was, actually one of my best friends is an extrovert - though he’s able to watch inside from time to time . Under the surface, all those differences are just like ripples in water. Human stupidity is the art of making problems out of ripples 
.
I am rather introvert, although I am not as shy as some describe themselves.I had more problems speaking to person a few years ago, though.My main “problem” (is it one?) isn´t so much that I am too shy, but that I am simply not skilled (nor interested) in smalltalk.
You know, it´s like “uhm… nice weather… yeah… yesterday it wasn´t as nice… yes…”
I think it is true that the majority of people in here are rather introvert.I once read in a fantasy- forum, and I read a drug-forum.Fantasy was also full of introverts, drugforum is divided into psychedelic-drugusers and “party”-drugusers.There´s definately some link between being intro/extrovert and interests.
Still, on the “all extroverts are stupid” topic, I gotta say that one of my best friends I´d describe as extrovert.Perhaps such friendships are a bit harder to keep up, but it is a good thing since you can learn from each other.
Traumgänger
that it !!! it’s not so much that i’m too shy to talk to someone, it’s that i’ll have nothing to say. and nobody cares about the weather anyway. and if you see a girl and are like “hey, what’s up” “nothing” “you know… i had the coolest LD last night” she’ll probably just think you’re weird, but… i am weird… maybe i should try that hmm… 
I must point out here that there are several types of extroverts and introverts. It depends on how they perceive things (abstractly or synthetically) and how they pass judgmenent (values or logic) . Of course this is only one way of categorizing them. I m sure there are zillions of other ways to categorize. Not always a useful thing, may I add.
However, this type of categorisation has the advantage that it helps you actually understand why people do the things they do, the way they do it, and why different people do it with different ways.
One of my best friends (known him for 10 years) is also an extrovert. It is not [b] this [\b] trait that makes him highly incompatible with me, though. It’s that he is a pure Feeler, and he can’t think logically at all. This means, among other things, that he has no strength whatsoever to state his opinion. When I get angry at him, I tend to think that this is because he has no opinion … The fact is that extroverted feelers (not people who feel - that would be stupid- just people who make decisions based on values) most frequent shape their opinions after having heard the opinions of all the people around them (like a mean) . On the other hand introverted thinkers tend to have a very strong argumentation, which is hard to beat. (which is not very good, either, because at the end of the day, and like extroverted feelers, they get opinionated and thus miss the whole point of diversity)
So, it’s not the extroversion which makes the relationship with them all bad. I know an extroverted person who is REALLY compatible with me (like the same music, same books, think exactly the same way,act the same way) , with the difference that he actually LIKES going to parties and feels very confident about his skills. Whereas, I score (NOT) in both things.
If anyone is interested in all this typology thing, say so and I ll search for some good bookmarks to post…
Heck I say, love all people!! Everyone is different and everyone is the same… LOVE THE PEOPLE!!! PEACE ALLLLL!
FLOWER POWER FOR EVER 
& peace
Sorry, but I HAD to post this.Someone else would have anyway, I just wanted to be the first 
Traumgänger
shyness sucks. . . It is very extreme for me. I NEVER initiate a conversation with a girl. If I girl talks to me, I generally respond with a single word. The thought of talking with a cute girl scares the crap out of me. I have been very slowly getting better, but it’s still really bad. part of me doesn’t even want to date just because of my fear of talking to girls. It doesn’t help that there are very defined groups of different “popularity” around here. Naturally, the quiet ones tend to stick together and form the “loser” groups.
I think a lot of people often mistake my shyness for a lack of intelligence. In my freshman year of highschool, this girl I liked sat next to me in spanish. Because of this, I could not concentrate very well. The teacher would call on me and I would respond with “uhhhh. . … ummmm”, but I could not think straight. Later when one of my friends asked why she didn’t like me, she basically said I wasn’t very smart. It really sucks because my raging horomones are so contradicted by my shyness. I want a relationship more than just about anything, and I fear it more than anything.
yawn
Not trying to be insultive here but I mean, c’mon. Face the facts: Life is too short to waste on shying away from possibilities of happiness. When a girl looks at you, don’t worry about logic and instinct (which in this case suprisingly is to panic like someone’s gonna beat you…) and just go up to her and get her number and walk away.
How to get rid of shyness (despite your age): Start off at stores. Just go in somewhere and buy something… there people are paid to be friendly to you (basically).
Then, if you start understanding my drift of wasting oppertunities, just go up to people and say “Hi, I’m name, today I’m meeting new people, thanks for participating” and just walk away. Just for laughs I’ve done this myself and gotten some pretty positive feedback (like me starting to walk away and her pulling my arm to talk more).
The world is yours… don’t waste it.
Oh and as always, I highly recommend www.doubleyourdating.com for advice and great programs to boost self-esteem - worked for me 
And as always you can PM me your e-mail address and christmas will come earlier this year (with a special eBook about boosting self-confidence that helped me a shitload, only 400kb in size).
I understand what you’re saying about wasting oppurtunities. This one guy at school who is known for talking alot and acting strange in general explained his behavior by saying “we only live once. You should do what you feel like, and not worry about what other people think because it doens’t matter”. I agree 100% with him. The problem is when it comes time to act upon this belief, it just doesn’t happen. I think that, for outgoing people, it’s easy to think that shy people are only shy because they choose to be (sort of like overdramatizing one’s problem I guess). They think that it’s as simple as making yourself do it, and you can do it without much fear. This is because that is how it works for them. For us shy people, it’s not that easy.
For instance, in my chemistry class last year my lab partner was a VERY good looking girl. One day I told myself “I’m gonna say hi to her when she sits down, no matter what”. So she comes in, sits down, and I fail to say anything. I imagine that had I somehow managed to force the word out of my mouth, it would have been an embarrasing little squealing sound. I had even been thinking “what could possibly go wrong? at worst, she will say “uh. . . hi” unenthusiastically, then it’s over.” It didnt’ matter though, nothing could make me do it. man thats not good when I can’t say a one syllable word to a girl. . . It doesn’t help that in my less popular group of friends there is not a single female. That makes gaining experience just about impossible.
Well anyway, I just got a job and start working tomorrow. I’m hoping this will help my problem. I’ll also check out that site, chosenone.
I’ll do my best to avoid insulting you too, but I don’t think you quite understand the problem.
It’s just not a possibility for some of us to break away and begin spontaneously approaching random people to converse with. Being shy is a very indomitable condition, and it takes more than a brief contemplation of life to overcome it permanently. True, life is short, and you’ll never get anywhere keeping to yourself and passing up every opportunity as it comes along - but it’s the same as telling a person with arachnophobia that the particular spider on their head isn’t dangerous at all. Are they going to listen?
I gave up trying to work out how to overcome the problem. I’m satisfied with simply hiding away in my dark lair, only emerging for work, and when I require something that I can’t download from the internet. You might say “Hey, you’re wasting your life in there”, but I don’t see it that way anymore. I’d say you were wasting your life pursuing girls to fulfill life’s primary objective (yes, reproduction is the meaning of life), when you could be spending time by yourself and bettering skills that actually matter.
Defying humanity is fun.
Personally I think using a condom to defy humanity would be more fun.
You’re not defying humanity by using a condom, because you’re still succumbing to your primal instincts.
You’re defying humanity when you’re using a gun.
Atheist is right, it isn’t that easy to overcome, for the people that are seriously affected by it it can be terrifing to face.
I remember when I had a speech to do in English one time, when I got up the front I nearly vomited 
It may be easy to say “Today im gonna do it, today im gonna talk to them!” but when it comes to the crunch… nothing.
Like one time when someone I didn’t know asked me something and I tryed to reply, all that came out was a croking sound, because I was so scared someone was talking to me.
It isn’t easy.
For me it isn’t about what people think about me, I just fell extremly uncomfortable being noticed by other people.
er uh. . . good point. Although by eating you are also succumbing to your instincts. In fact, by seeking pleasure you are giving in to your instincts. Bummer, I guess you’re still human. Also, you said that the primary objective of life is to reproduce. Having sex with a condom is not reproduction (unless you get very unlucky). Therefore, having sex with a condom is not fullfulling your primary objective. You have cheated your humanity even more by experiencing the pleasure of sex without creating a loud, crying, screaming baby. In the end though, this really all comes down to opinion, so neither of us is truly correct.
You said it.
(Back to topic)
It was said earlier that people who aren’t shy are usually jerks. Clearly this was intended to cheer up some of the less outgoing members of the forum, but regardless, everyone slammed the author into the ground for it. Personally, I agree with him. Most of the guys I know who aren’t bound by limited self-confidence are complete jerks. There seems to be this inherent lack of sensibility that goes with being outgoing. I’m not saying this is the case in every situation, but the percentage is up there in the very high 90’s. I used to speculate when I was younger that being self-contained was a sign of intelligence, and to a large degree, I still stand by that.
Just my personal experience.
Atheist wrote,
Like what, masturbation?
Ha Ha Ha Ha! Thats a good one! This is one of your jokes right?
Once there was a fox who saw a tasty bunch of grapes hanging high above the path…aw, forget it. 
A joke? Nah, just a casual observation. I know a lot of guys who are generally quite shy, and I know a lot who aren’t. The more contained guys just seem to be better at working out problems, and can demonstrate more advanced academic skills. Probably a result of their condition, but it’s a pretty clear pattern. shrugs
You were right to joke. Try as I might, I can’t think of anything that I would consider to be a ‘worthwhile’ skill to take the place of mindless sex-hunting. So, go for it. Run about like animals in the night and pretend you’re a decent and caring guy, just to get as many girls as you can. Hey, why not? We’re all designed for it.
Athiest,
I think u make some good points but u also seem to stereotype. Being shy doesn’t mean anything and being outgoing also means very little. Each and every individual is different and displays different characteristics.
I myslef used to be shy but have learned to accept myself and love myself enabling me to love everyone and everything around me and now because i am outgoing i am still able to display all though characteristics i had when i was shy.
Everyon has to understand that keeping to yourself is not beneficial. By communicating with people, other animals and the environment u learn many things about life as well as yourself. By closing yourself of to these things and accepting that state is not healthy and not a way to continue your journey whichever way it might lead.