also why is my sucbonscious so hostile to me sometimes?
Is it a reflection of me as a person? Or does it simply represent inner turmoil, or is my subconscious not hostile at all, just, somehow I think it is, so it’s presenting itself the way i subconsciously perceive it (haha… weird)
…?
I mean, lately my sex demon theme is back, I’ll be getting it on and the women turn into demons… and I mean, I chastised my mind to no end about this, I think…
what’s so horrible is ever since I went to astralpulse.com i’ve halfheartedly believed in “energy vampires” so I always worry that these “demons” are REAL and they are draining my “energy” so I try to channel energy back into me to compensate, but then they just suck my dry… i tried gold energy because i thought gold was heavenly and it would be bad for them, but it wasn’t in particular.
(i don’t think they are real but i’d prefer being like i used to be where I “knew” it was all nonsense, i’m too open minded to just say “nah it’s fake”)
oh and I mean I was trying to use a mantra to get a hot girl to sit next to me (in real life yes, why not? it’s worth a try), and one would have, except this guy took this chair next to me to use it to try to fix a projector,a nd right when he did that girl walked in and couldn’t find a place to sit, as there were only like 3 places left, so she chose the one that was far away from me because no chair was near me.
is this the work of my subconscious? I mean, iif so, the thing is simultaneously helping me (be more confident/social etc) and playing rather mean jokes on me… and giving me bad dreams about traffic accidents… something involving November 12th no less…